Wednesday, May 4, 2016

Insecure Writer's Support Group: I Have A Secret

It's the first Wednesday of the month!  You know what that means...It's time for an Insecure Writer's Support Group (IWSG) post.  

And what is this, you ask?  For those of you unfamiliar with this concept, it was the brilliant brainchild of our ninja captain, Mr. Alex Cavanaugh.  Alex is a truly awesome guy, and started the IWSG so that writers from all walks and stages on this crazy, amazing journey could come together and share stories, advice, fears, support.... you name it... we've got it!

SO.  I've been keeping a secret.  

Yuuuppp.... and a fairly big one, at that.  

It's something that I haven't shared with anyone... none of my friends, nor my family (except my sister).

I keep it deep inside, afraid to show the world.

...Yet it won't be even the tiniest bit of a surprise to any of you...

I write.  

I want to be a writer.

I AM a writer.  

No one knows this.  No one at work.  Not even my very best friends.  Sometimes it seems like I'm living two lives, chasing two careers... each integral to who I am.  

The one where I wake up every morning, hustle out of bed, go through the motions to drag myself out of the house and onto the train... eventually finding myself chained to my desk, scheduling deployments and pumping out reports...

The other where I can barely wait to slip upstairs, open up my laptop, double click that word doc... anticipating the excitement when that cursor flashes provocatively at me, while my fingers itch to fly across the keyboard...

Okay, so it's not exactly rocket science that writing is where I'm happiest ;)  

I'm not sure why I've been keeping it a secret.  

Perhaps it's because writing is such a personal journey.  When you think about it... you are literally pouring your soul out onto a tiny scrap of paper, transcribing your deepest, innermost thoughts from the darkest recesses of your mind... bringing them into the sunlight, rust, cobwebs and all..

It's real... it's honest... it's raw...

I'm not quite sure I'm ready for the world to see.

Maybe I want to have something to show for it first...

What about you guys?  Have any of you kept your writing a secret?  Told the world, your closest friends?  And why have you or haven't you?